A Friend...

I met this lady once. She was kind and friendly--maybe a little too friendly for my liking at the time. She insisted on hugging me the moment she met and greeted me. I found this to be a tad freaky. I'm not one to hug or enjoy hugging complete strangers, but I indulged this freakishly friendly lady and allowed her to hug me because there was just something about her that made it okay and not so weird. She answered all my questions, reassured me that everything was okay and told me I would be able to do it. She put my mind at ease about the unknown abyss I had just jumped into. She even let me "steal" a smiley face gumball from her desk. Overall, my first impression of this lady was this: a hugger--something I wasn't. I was also sure she would be the obnoxiously overly peppy, always happy, smiling lady who would insist on hugging me every time she saw me. (My friend actually didn't end up being that person I realized over time. The person who ended up being the hug happy, peppy one was Andrea. Haha.) However, having this first impression of my friend wasn't really something I was looking forward to being the party pooper I was. However, she was nice and sincere so I was willing to put up with it. Little did I know three months following that day it would be her putting up with me...for seven months! I also didn't realize at the time of our first meeting just how grateful I would be to see the overly peppy lady on my first day of school.
I was scared to death, sitting in a room full of people I didn't know when I felt someone put a hand on my shoulder. I whipped around to find out who dared touch me to see my hug happy friend from a couple of months before. A face I recognized! I was sooo...relieved! She asked if I was doing okay and with a shaky unsure voice I said, "Yeah." I was totally lying. I wanted to puke my guts out. She smiled and told me I was gong to be okay. I on the other hand wasn't so sure. I decided at that point regardless of this lady's hugging history she would end up being someone rather important in my life and would end up being one of my most favorite people at the school. Boy that ended up being an understatement! At the end of the day I'm pretty sure I had gone into her office at least a half of dozen times all because she was the only person I knew. As it turns out I would spend every possible free moment I had in her office for months to come. That poor woman. I don't know how she dealt with it. I was a complete and total brat my first few months of school. I would sit in her office totally distraught, nearly in tears, having zero faith in myself, complaining about everything and even telling her how much I wanted to quit....EVERY SINGLE DAY! Do you know what this lady did? She listened to it all...EVERY SINGLE DAY! She listened to every single complaint I had and she even justified all my feelings. She didn't have to listen to my gripes. She could have closed her door to me--she probably should have. She just kept telling me, "You're going to be okay. You can do this. It'll get better--just give it time. One day you'll thank me for keeping you here." She never gave up on me even after I had given up on myself. She never walked out on me even though I had walked out on school. She always believed I would succeed.
She was right. I ended up being okay. I did do it. And it did get better. The person I am today is mostly the result of what this lady did for me months ago. I owe her my life and everything I have. She is someone I hold near and dear to my heart. Thank you for making me all that I was meant to be. You shall NEVER be forgotten and you WILL always be cherished. I love you.

A Promise To Myself.

WHEN IT COMES TO THIS LIFE

I'M RELENTLESS

BY ANY MEANS.

MY DRIVE IS TO EXCEED ALL THAT IS

EXPECTED OF ME.

I FACE ALL OBSTICLES HEAD ON AND

EACH ONE I WILL OVERCOME.

ALL GOALS ARE MORE THAN

ACHIEVABLE.

I WILL SUCCEED.

MY POTENTIAL IS ENDLESS.

I CONTROL MY OWN DESTINY IS MY

PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS.

YES, THIS IS MY LIFE LONG MISSION AND

I COULDN'T STOP IF I WANTED TO.

FROM BEGINNING TO THE END,

BEING AMY IS ALL I KNOW AND

ANYTHING ELSE WOULD BE A

DISRESPECT TO MYSELF.

My Letter To Myself

About a year ago at the beginning of massage school we were given the assignment to write ourselves a letter as if we had already graduated-- a letter from the future if you will. I worte this letter because I had to, not necessarily because I thought I was actually going to be graduating. I was still unsure of massage school and when I sat and down and earnestly thought about the future I had a hard time believing I was going to finish school. I wrote this letter anyways and did it as honestly as I could. Two months following graduation I received my letter in the mail and it brought a few tears to my eyes. I CAN'T believe how far I have come.

Amers,
Hey hotness! (Yes. I really did start my letter that way thanks to Olivia, my ten year old niece.) Congratulations on graduating from freakin' massage school! Can you believe it!?! I know there were many, many, many times you wanted to throw in the towel, but you kept on truckin' and have come SOOO...far! Thanks to your AMAZING support system; your parents, the Beach's, and all the great instructors and staff at UCMT you have learned some great skills and more importantly you learned A LOT, A LOT about yourself.
Thanks to Char you learned how to say, "I CAN" instead of saying and believing "I can't" You CAN!! I know you struggled with believing in yourself and trusting yourself and your body, but look at all you have overcome and are able to do! You are just as capable as anyone in this world. Don't allow your disability to disable you. Instead, allow it to enable you! Now go forth and conquer! I'm really proud of ya and all you have accomplished in these last seven months. You ROCK my SOCKS!
Oh yeah! Don't forget about Cat--she's been your saving grace a number of times throughout this journey. Don't forget to thank her for always being there for you and keeping you going even when you thought your world was crashing down around you. Always be grateful for the role she played in your life.
Remember the instructors and their patience, kindness, and willingness to help you in ANY way they could in order for you to grow and succeed. Be grateful for the challenges they put before you--you're stronger because of them.

Love,
Amy

Funny how just within a few weeks of school I already had a feeling of what I was getting myself into and just how hard I was going to get pushed. I was also aware of how badly I may end up wanting to quit. Yet, at the same time there was still just enough of the "unknown" to keep me from running away in fear. Had I known just how school was going to go from the very start there would have been no chance in hell I would have even bothered in staying through to the second day. I would have given up.
It's also funny how I knew who the important people were going to be and who was going to keep me going. I did thank Cat and I continue to thank Cat for what she did for me. And I'll ALWAYS be grateful for her. I owe her everything I have and she has played a pivitol role in the person I have become.
The one thing that ended up surprising me the most was how much I learned to love body work. There were times during school when I was absolutely sure I wasn't going to become a therapist in the end. Now? It's kind of surprising to me how happy I am to go to work and how much fun I have doing it. I love what I do and school really did change my life for the better. I am a completely different person today because of school and all the lessons I learned there. For the first time I think in my life I am truly happy to be Amy. I wouldn't change anything for the world. I am exactly right where I want to be and life couldn't be any better.

My Job Is Awesome!

Something a friend said to me got me to thinkin'. I made the comment about going to work and being extremely excited about it and she asked me to send her some of my enthusiasm. My first thought was: everyone who works should have the same enthusiasm for their jobs as I do for mine. How horrible it would be to wake up every day not looking forward to the day ahead and not enjoying the work I do. Work shouldn't be a hassle nor should it be something you resent. It should be enjoyable and something you love doing. I love being a massage therapist. When I go to work I am excited and I never get bored--that's the way all jobs should be. For years I thought work had to be hard and zero fun, then I entered the massage field and realized how wrong I had been. Work can and should be fun, exciting, and fulfilling and that's what I get out of my job. I never thought anything I did in life could have such a positive affect on my life like body work has. School helped me grow as a person and every time I go to work I grow as a therapist. I take pride in what I do and I wish it was the same for everyone. I love the quote, "If you love what you do you will never have to work another day in your life." It's so true. Work to me isn't a paycheck anymore--it's more than that now. It's being able to help those in need, it's about serving others in the world and giving back. I get up and go to work because I love it, not because I have to. My job is awesome and the work I do is awesome! Every day I wake up I am grateful for UCMT for providing me with the amazing education which ultimately enabled me to be in a career I love and am truly passionate about.

Filbert!

I wonder how people have so many things to blog about. I never have much to say because nothing ever seems to happen. How do you do it? How do you come up with enough stuff to get on the computer and write it all down? Becasue nothing seems to happen coupled with my enjoyment of blogging I have no choice but to write a completely random blog about nothing in particular. This weeks topic--FILBERT!

Filbert...mighty mighty Filbert. He's the highlight of one of my boring weeks. A couple weeks ago I went and visited career services at my school to discuss finding me a job. I'm pretty sure I have the funniest career counselor at that school--Cherie. She's a riot! I enjoy visiting her--she's always good for a laugh. Well Cherie has this plant that sits on her desk--perfectly placed for optimal sunshine. Because of where the plant sits it tends to attack anyone who sits at Cherie's desk. I've been attacked by this plant before so one week I decided to embrace the plant and nip the attacking problem in the bud from the very get go. I didn't even give the plant a fighting chance. Before taking my seat at Cherie's desk I picked up the plant and set it on my lap where it stayed for the remainder of my visit. However, there was an instant bond between the two of us when the plant became incapacitated and was no longer able to attack my head. He kinda started to grow on me the longer I was there so eventually I had to name him! Filbert is his name and he's my little plant buddy. Any time I go visit career services I pick him up and craddle him in my arms. He's still a little out of control and if given the chance he will try and pollinate your head, and he may need to be rotated in the sun regularly but he's my Filbert and he's a keeper and a little bit of a cutie as far as a plant is concerned. Hahaha. My visits with Cheire are always enjoyable but with Filbert added to the mix one never knows what might just happen. You could end up wearing a fuzzy pink tiara on your head, with a banana sucker in your mouth, posing for a silly picture. It's totally unpredictable in that office I'm tellin' ya, but that's why I like it and keep going back.

My Life Plan

So I've had like a million and one people ask me what I'm going to do with my life since finishing school...well... I'm not sure. However, never wanting to disappoint anyone I asked my very wise buddy "Yoda" what my plan is and being the amazing person Yoda is, this is what they came up with. Sooo...until further notice this is my life folks! Yoda was persistent that I NEVER forget that last line either. As long as I remember that and believe it all is well.

Why is it...

What happens if you are the first person I think about when I wake up and the last person on my mind before I go to bed? Why is it that when my phone vibrates and makes that funny chirp I can’t help but smile and maybe even giggle a little because I know it’s you? Why is it that I hate to be touched with a deep fiery passion but the first thing I do when we’re walking side by side is reach for your hand? Why is it that when you touch me, I get goose bumps and all sorts of tinglies? (Yes, I did just say tinglies). Why is it I go out of my way to find reasons to hug you? ME!?! Hugging others. Preposterous. Why is it that when I rest my head on your shoulder it fits perfectly between your neck and chest--like it's meant to be there? Why is it that when I spend time with you the closest people in my life can tell just by the silly smirk on my face and demand to know where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing? Is it really that obvious that you make me that happy? How utterly disgusting. Why is it that when anyone mentions your name whether it’s in reference to you or not me eyes light up, I smile and go, “Awww…?” How is it that I could be having the worse day in all of America-- seriously on the verge of killing someone, and yet the moment I see you all those feelings leave me and I’m suddenly a calm happy camper? WHY must I be so damned happy?!? How can just one person have such an affect on another? How can just one person change the way I look at and feel towards certain things? How come I can go my whole life HATING hugs, doing all I can to avoid them and yet, the moment I see you I HAVE to wrap my arms around you? And if I don't? My day just sucks.

I don't know why this happens and I'm still not sure if I like what is happening, but if this is the cost of being with you I will do it--and most likely with a smile on my face.

Kimmy so help me god if you make fun of this I will beat you silly and kick you off my blog! Oh, and never ever ever speak to you again!